WHY DO I ALWAYS LAUGH SO DAMN HARD AT HIS STUPID SIMPLE AMAZING BLUNT RESPONSES???
for every 50 notes this gets i’ll read a chapter of this book:
A man escapes from a prison where he’s been locked up for 15 years. He breaks into a house and inside, he finds a young couple in bed. He ties him to a chair. While tying the wife to the bed, the convict gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom.
While he’s in there, the husband whispers over to his wife,
“Listen, this guy is an escaped convict. Look at his clothes! He’s probably spent a lot of time in jail and hasn’t seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck. If he wants sex, don’t resist, don’t complain. Do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is obviously very dangerous. If he gets angry, he’ll kill us both. Be strong, honey. I love you!”
She responds, “He wasn’t kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me that he’s gay, thinks you’re cute, and asked if we had any Vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you, too.”
oh my god
when you feel the first cramp
i swear to god if i see another person saying ‘if you think obesity is bad, you’re a fat shamer!!’
obesity is a real problem that causes lots of diseases
and just because i don’t like obesity, doesn’t mean i don’t like obese people
it’s like, i hate cancer, but i don’t hate people with cancer or shame people who have cancer
when someone asks me what kind of music i like
Daleks have no concept of elegance!
In which Dean dies and Castiel is left to mourn him.
…who gave you the right……
Metatron it’s time to stop posting
You know what would make this even more tragic?…. If he said “I love you” in that last gif.